Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Sweet Baby's latest accomplishment is crawling backwards. She tries with all her might to crawl forwards, her arms pulling her body towards me. But her legs drag her backwards, and since they're stronger, back she goes. The back and the front limbs have yet to figure out how to work in concert, which frustrates her. But she keeps trying, and she keeps backing into furniture, and corners, and all sorts of places she didn't intend to go.
I see waaaaaaay too many similarities with how our lives tend to work. But one day way too soon Sweet Baby will figure this whole crawling thing out, will switch from reverse to forward, and turn our lives upside down (eeep!) But do we ever figure it out?? We intend to move forward, to turn away from our sins, to do better, to be meaningful, to be whatever that vision of ourselves we carry. But in the end, don't we end up backing up into the same old dusty corners? Bringing out the same old favorite sins?
We are both saint and sinner. We earn our sinner status. God gives us our sainthood. There are just many days when I want to ask "make mine a double, Lord!" Because, boy do I need to make up for some big backward steps.
But we're supposed to carry on with boldness anyway. Keep on, even though we are flawed messengers. Trust that God's work through us will be sufficient, that God's grace is sufficient too. Even for us backward crawlers, who never seem to get our forward and reverse figured out.