Friday, May 26, 2006

Wait and pray

The house is quiet except for the buzz of the computer. Dishes are still in the sink. Load of laundry waiting to be done in the hamper. The blessed gift of sleep awaits.
So much waiting to be done or said. Unfinished conversations hover in the air, waiting to be released and completed (for now anyway). Unfinished chores and duties shuffle and shift in the back of the mind, waiting to step to the forefront and be dismissed as done.
I'm waiting too. Waiting for enlightenment, patience, peace, certainty, gratitude, simplicity, empowerment, confidence...too much to list. The wish for what you unreasonably hope for and the cold reality of what is square off in the corner, and though pipe dreams put up a good fight, the cold shower of how things really are hits the knockout every time. But still crazy hope lingers.
The disciples waited after Jesus ascended into heaven, not knowing when the gift of the Holy Spirit would come. Or what would happen when it came. It ended up being ten days of waiting and praying. I wonder if it was excruciating, unnerving, exhilarating, uncertain, frustrating, empowering...? I know a little about waiting. It was all of the above. Waiting for my beloved to return from a long absense, waiting so many years to conceive, waiting for my child to be born, waiting for things to get better, waiting to get smarter or wiser. Or thinner.
Come Holy Spirit. Until then, I'll wait. And pray. With all the reserves of crazy hope within me.

Communion day and Lilacs

I thought I was going to be so much better about posting, but here it is, a month after my first post, and I'm finally back. Today is Private Communions day again. I really don't like that title. There's nothing truly private about communion, not even if it's just two people in the room. One of the awesome, inspiring aspects of Communion is that when you receive it, you are connected with all Christians both living and dead. You are connected to the whole body of Christ, the whole community. So even if you are home-bound or in the nursing home, you are still connected to the community. So what is a better title for the day when I visit 2 nursing homes, 1 assited living center, and 5 private homes to share Holy Communion? I'm going to have to think about it. Home Communions? Hmmmm. Not sure, I'll have to try it on for size for a while.

The lilacs are blooming like crazy this year. They are so full and vibrant compared to other years. One of the ladies in my congregation said that it was because they had been nipped by frost last year. Adversity made the plants work that much harder, so they are extra beautiful and fragrent now. I'm sure there is a great sermon illustration in that, and there's several scriptures lessons that immediately come to mind to pair with it, but I refuse to go there right now. Let lilacs be lilacs. Let them be appreciated for what they are, the pleasure they bring, and the Godly love that placed them here.

Speaking of lilacs reminds me of something that happened this week. My father-in-law and a good friend of ours has been with us for a week, helping shingle (that experience needs its own blog! Arrgh!) My husband and our friend Kurt were sitting side by side on the roof working away, but they had very different levels of pleasure at the moment I came out to talk to them one afternoon. My husband was sitting closest to the "stink hole," the pipe that channels fumes from the plumbing. Nasty smell! Kurt was sitting closer to the front end of the house, and could smell the lilacs from across the street since the wind was blowing just right. Amazing what difference a few feet can make, and what it did for attitudes! No huge moral to this story, it just really struck me at the time. It also opened up some great jokes and teasing for my husband.